Had not been a very nice month......
So many stuff happen...

My dad's hurt....
My gu zhang being very serious...
Doctor mentioned.....
听天由命。。。。
Oh my.....
doctor say this kind of stuff....

I had send a complain email to NUH.....
see what they will do la!!!!

Sad!!!!
Crying Within!!!


What the hack..
I go back home…
Wanna discuss my dad’s celebration on sat again….
To find my didi not at home ma..
So after I bath..
I ask my mummy where is her son, my bro..
She say…
Go hospital….
I ASKED…. WHAT??? HOSPITAL…. WITH WHO…
She say with dad!!!
I SAY … WHAT? WITH DAD???? FOR WHAT????
She say dad is hurt!!
I ASKED…. SHOCK.. WHAT……. HURT???? WHERE?
She say hand!!!
I ASKED… WHAT … HURT…. HAND…. WHY???
She say dun know.
She say bro just let her know around 7..
Dad didn’t want to tell her also……

What the hack…..
I sms my brother..
They saying heading back le….
So I wait at the door man……

Come back liao..
Shock… big big bandage at the hand…
I asked him what happen la…

Wah…..
He describe the injury as follow…..
Cos working ma.. so he was like pushing some platat dun know how to spell la.. some heavy stuff la..
When this stupid forklife controller push the whole stack of stuff and the stuff wobble and like wanna drop..
So instinctly, never think much my dad go hold..
And the pole beside came squeezing in….
Then the pole and the suff come together with my dad’s finger in the middle..
I ask my bro and dad how is the injury like..
Guess what expression..

My brother ask me go take a hotdog he will do a demo for me..
Idiot…
So the injury you imagine ar..
Is like a sausage or hot dog heating in a oven, and as time pass, it “spilt” and “pi chek”…
Oh goss…
So you can imagine the blood just pour …
My dad say the blood really pour.
U cannt imagine how much blood can come out from just a finger…
He say he can see his whole flesh out lor….
And the boss quickly send him to polyclinic..
Oh mine…
He say that moment he leg wobble and go to the ground..
Whole is spinning and eye black….
But didn faint….
White face somemore…
Everyone got scare lor…

So went to poly clinic..
Which I dun know why..
So the stupid bunch of doctor and nurse give him a bandage to cover…
Then refer him to NUH….

Why of all place.. NUH..
I hate this hospital especially after my gu zhang’s incident..
A hospital with no good doctor and doctor or nurse ettique lor!!!!

Ok so he went in..
From morning till evening then got operation…..
He went in..
Head of Nurse attend to him….
The head of nurse try to open up the bandage and realize the stupid polyclinic nurse didn’t manage it properly…
My dad’s injury flesh was stick to the bandage..
Wow…
My dad was yelling…
Cos he say the biggest pain he got man…..
The head of nurse was commenting and scolding the polyclinic nurse how did the hell they do this to the patient lor..
So he slowly open… my dad did it himself too…
Then the head of nurse, patiently manage the injuries again…
Making my dad feel better..
But got to wait for the operation la….

Then 2nd, round.. preparing for the operation liao.. the other nurse came along..woman..
Just now that one was a guy.. imagine..
So the woman open, then wanna bandage again..
My bro saw that the woman did not do the same as what the head of nurse did..
He asked her..
I tot the head of nurse did put some solution before bandage, you want to apply the solution also…
Wah sack…..the woman nurse maybe wanna hide face, say …
“orh, dun need, temp de”””,,.,


Ok ok la…
Do lor….
Then ar..
Operation wanna begin de time ar,… the doctor started to take off the bandage…
Great deal of pain lor..
Cos… BANDAGE STUCK AND STICK TO THE FLESH AGAIN….
My dad was yelling..
The stupid doctor still can say.. NEVER MIND, IS LIKE THAT DE..
The nurse ask my dad to breadth deep…
Pls la.. which person dun know..
Baby also know breadth deep…
But the thing is…
You bunch of nurse didn’t manage it properly..
Now ADDING PAIN TO PATIENT…
That idiot doctor open the bandage very qing song like that..
My dad say very pain..
He didn’t bother..
Even until the flesh part, that doctor just tear out the bandage…
Goss…
My dad shout..
And what happen..
The flesh was BEING TEARED AGAIN…
BLOOD POUR AGAIN…
For information, blood already stopped one….
….
But when it bleed again, both doctor and helping nurse was shock to see such a deep cut….

Then my dad say, the doctor just say a calm and cold sorry..
As if saying sorry is eating rice like that..
Wah..
See..
Worst story coming…

So to do operation to sew ma….
Ok 2 numb injection in…..
The doctor say he starting..
My dad asked…
Starting ar?
Still very pain leh.. he still can feel pain meaning not numb at all….
The doctor say…
IS LIKE THAT DE.. CAN START DE…
He start one…
My dad yell like crazy……
Then he believe not numb…
So then sorry again la…
He put another numb injection..
Then this time round.. my dad say is numb le…
Story finish…


Oh goss..
If I were there..
I tell you…
My heart and mouth will rule my brain and head lor…
I will complain till dun need pay bill wor….
Receiveing this kind of bad, low standard and no quality treatment….
Cost $1700…..


Stupid bunch of doctor..
They got their cert for knowledge but NO CERT AT ALL FOR SOCIAL MORAL, CONSIDERATION, CARING, KINDNESS AND AS SUCH LOR…..
I tot doctor should be more caring then people, more careful and considerate or even more passion and meticulous and more and more whatever then others de..
In the end…

Oh adding pain to patient..
I thinking how my dad say pain I wanna cry lor..
Stupid doctor, not on his dad’s body ….. he didn’t feel la…..

My dad come back…
Sit on the sofa..
Jelly…
Pale…
I see him..
He say pain…
First time in the world did he like that before….
Cos Is real pain…

Wanna discuss sat outing also dun feel like liao lor…
Wah..
I really wanna smack the doctor….
And nurse..
But the head of nurse really nice la I must say…..

Sad!!!!
My dad now is injured condor man!!!
Cos is right hand….


i think i becoming more and more nonsence liao..
dun know how to spell la....
people dun understand waht i talking...
ask me repeat i also think i crazy......
then need people to translate for me....
then cant listen properly...
oh goss....
something is eating into me!!!!!


mood no good anyway!!!


Maybe if you happen to highlight my content box...
u will be able to see what i wrote....

My temper is not really good.....
or....
My character is really trouble some...
i heard lot lot..
but i was commented that my EQ is not good..
1st time of the sort....

i take it.. of course.. a comment..
other might look you better than you look yourself..
i tried to ask why.....
but they look at each other..
and give some excuse not to answer..
hee gals..
if really this way.. i take it..
but do tell me why..
so i can reflect and know also..
dun need to be scare i angry or what..
not explaining to me might left me thinking abt it all day long....

can tried to leave comment to let me know how and why can?
i have comment column in here... ha

but if is becos i comment on boss, then to protect, i got the comment..
then i feel not really nice k!!!!

anyway... many mistook what is EQ!!!
Emotional Intelligence (EI) describes the ability, capacity, skill or, in the case of the trait EI model, a self-perceived ability, to identify, assess, and manage the emotions of one's self, of others, and of groups.

^{no time to write myself.. just copy from web la....}



not that i want to follow my decision and not to follow gp decision mean my EQ got problem..
gals.....
if this way. i would rather blame it on my character...
sister who known me years.. know that..
i dun want means i dun want..
not that i dun feel your emotion and dun understand your emotion..
but just that this is the way i am..
friend, accept it.... and understand it..

also might because... i have a world that is different or a complex character that i really think that not much people understand..
sometimes on some topic i will try to share why i think like that and why i do that.
and even to extent to try to explain why i am this way....
but if this single and different character let you think that my EQ is bad..
i am real sorry..
not that i didnt care.
but i just think that...
i dun want to force myself to do thing just becos the whole gp does this way....
then if i force myself to do it...
i will be having not a very nice face in total..............
not that i am not aware of the social's network emotion..
i am aware.. thus i try to explain so that i can manage the conter party's feeling as well..
that me...

those who known me years.. knows it....

if one think that they will be paiseh that they might wanna do something..
but i dun want and wish that i do the things together becos they really will fee bad that i am being left out...
dun need...
i dun feel its necessary..
cos in turn it make me think that i am the black sheep to make your do the things another way just to compromise me....
ha....
i am really ok with it de!!!!!

being tan bai.. is one thing for me ba!!!


ha of course... not that i cannot adapt..
just that i dun want to adapt to something which i dun like and dun wish to.
nothing big deal about adapting...
but habit is something that grows within....
of course one can say is just excuse..
but ok no big deal admiting is excuse if that habit is mine....
not adapting to some stuff...
i am not intruding others, i also dun believe not doing that stuff i will let your feel the world is down!!!
if i just do it the way people say i should, that not me...
if i am to adapt... it is to my own discret.... and to my own "eurika" experience to say its time to do so....
if is necessary like working.. i adapt..
or time for a social big public event.. i adapt...
if is to my own discretion.. i decide myself..
not to what other say i should..
this will be gp or social induce!!! its negative...

welcome to comment why i like that de...
also feel free to say i not cooperative.. but this is not EQ low....

like what i share, of course i will need to react and compromise some times...
even though i dun feel like..
but if circumstance i think i should..
i will go with the flow.....
cos i cannot be wet blanket alway..
but if the activity is asking me whether i want or not..
i think i will have the right to ask and enquiry about..
since people are doing so too.. why i cant right..
yeah to see if you are knowledgeable to answer is one thing..
but yeah..
since you ask.... i can question!!!!

but one thing.. sensitivity... i believe i got..
i know tons of people who dun know..
and tons who is not ti liang enough...

but i am sure not to have it when something reach my limit..
and not all people meet my this kind of situation la..
except family member la..
they always see my this side....



ok just a bit dun understand since this is the 1st time i got this comment..
thus do really wish to know why?????


but all humans should learn to be ti liang.. this is difficult...... people with high EQ will have tons of ti liang's ability...
but i do really think is my character!!!! not EQ!!!!

just like how your are like!!!
will always be friend and kagi and colleague....
i accpet your character with both hands!!!!

heee!!!!

just a message across to what i feel...
no harm.. no provoke... no anger!!!!


总之。。。
从不知道哪一天开始。。。。。
我的天空，我的世界，我的眼里，不管闭眼或睁开眼，
都是黑色的。。。

我好累。。。
人生的无奈。。。。
怎么我23岁而已。。
都体验的淋漓尽致了。。。。

败给什么我不知道。。。。
但。。。
人最大的敌人。。
大概是自己吧。。

我真的需要时间想通。。。。。。
乌云天天盖顶。。。。
我快呼吸不过来了。。。。

给我选择。。。
不想当人。。。
真的。。。
蚂蚁不错。。。。！！！


Cried the moment i step home...
The moment i saw my dad, i cried...
Just cried and cried...
Really tired tired..
so many thing..

i really hope to be an individual..
just an little, wei bu zu dao de individual enough...
having too many stuff to think of and to take on ....
is real tired..

dun like this.
just feeling all thing is not what i think of what it should be...
just feel tired...
real tired....







你处于死亡的边缘。曾经以为储存足够的希望，但是随着时间的推移，你的希望已经耗尽，性情低落得处于危险境地。现在的你害怕永远到不了那里，害怕永远无法从山顶看到那激动人心的景色。这是需要紧急开启你信心的地方，是灵魂开始工作，挽救精神的地方。你看，其他的东西失去作用后，信心将会借款一切。

信心捧着你的脸，直视着你的眼睛说：“继续走，孩子！”你这样做了，继续走，迎接了又一个黎明。。。




哭 CRY
“强壮还意味着知道怎么哭。强忍着不哭，对任何人都不是什么好事。别让骄傲阻挡受伤，因为受伤之时要放松你的戒备，让你敞开心扉并保持真实。如果不允许眼泪流出来，让所有的情绪都堵在里面，有一天你会忘记如何去感受，有一天你会崩溃。”
Will do it when I get home later, in my blanket…
懂得哭出来，也未尝不是一件坏事！！！





生病了。。。
好累。。。
眼睛干得要命。
头痛得要命。。
腰酸背痛。。。
喉咙也没好受到哪里去。。。。
天啊。。。真的是老了。。
不知老。。
还有一点。。。不知如何解释了。。。
别问我为什么还来上班。。。。
说了只有摇头而已。。。。。

抬起头。。看了看“前线追踪”。。
提到了。。。这个话题。。。
“小时候，父母都孩子照顾得无微不至，但长大了，孩子却对父母置之不理。。。。”

还好我爸没看到，不然，它的感触是都得不得了。。。

那天。。。。才刚刚跟清清说起过。。。。
因为我爸问过我嘛。。。

当我们是个小宝宝的时候，无论是我们大哭小哭。。
有多大吵大闹，或肚子饿时哭，就连让人受不了的拉跟撒时。。。。。。。。
父母都会无怨无悔的照顾我们，让我们舒舒服服，健健康康，不受到任何的“差错”的成长。。。。

但是，为什么，当我们人的cycle颠倒的时候。。。
我的意思是，当小宝宝长大后，父母渐渐老了的时候。。。
好多好多孩子，都不愿意照顾父母。。。。
就一样嘛。。。
吃饭，或煮饭，甚至买回来。。。。喝水。。。甚至泡茶泡咖啡而已。。
这些而已啊。。。。。
以前小时候，还没学习走路。。。
也是父母不想辛苦的抱着我们嘛！！！
手臂很酸的。。。！！！！


这样问我。。。
你们说。。
我该怎么回答。。。
我告诉他。。
人生嘛。。。就是这样呀。。。
但是我一定会要和你们在一起的啦。。
接着。。
爸说。。。
父母的责任就是疼爱孩子，栽培孩子，让他们一辈子快乐的度过。。
以后我们照顾不照顾他。。。。孝不孝顺。。。。
他不介意。。。只希望我们幸福。。。。。

你说。。我这个老爸。。。。
真的没得嫌。。。。。。
当你每次这么说，我很压力的你知不知道。。。。

别问我为什么。。
但我告诉我爸了。。。
不会让他有机会被我丢下。。也不会让他有机会丢下我。。。。
要你们一辈子跟我。。。。
哈！！！！